The Maquina Massacre: The Greatest Half the Seattle Sounders Ever Played
Actium. Red Cliffs. Manzikert. Mineiraço.
Such crushing battles dot the history of the world. To bored schoolchildren, they are dates to be remembered and forgotten. To the historically inclined, they are subjects of interest. To the writers of legend and story, they are the bedrock of great narrative.
For the victor of such a clash, no story of their rise can be told without mention of the pivotal triumph. There is no Augustus without Actium, no Toni Kroos without 7-1.
So too is it pivotal for the vanquished. There is no Cao Cao without Red Cliffs, no Byzantines without Manzikert. The Mineiraço has changed the Portuguese language itself, so calamitous was Brazil’s defeat.
As of July 31, 2025, you can add another to that list.
The Maquina Massacre.
The Sounders and the Cementeros alike will never forget what happened in those forty-five minutes.
Seattle had perhaps the greatest half the team has ever or will ever have. But it was not just that, it was a revenge game of ultimate proportions. In July of 1997, a little over 28 years before Thursday’s match, the Sounders suffered the biggest loss in their history – to the selfsame Maquina.
That Machine was like Arnold’s Terminator: 11-0 was the score.
Since then, the names of those who have entered this world include Obed Vargas, Pedro de la Vega, Osaze de Rosario, Jesus Ferreira. Others on the Sounders are older; Nouhou is a month older than 11-0, while Yeimar was about five when it happened. All six of them found the back of the net that Thursday night.
The Machine these men came up against earlier in the year was one that lived up to its name. The first match in Seattle was a well-fought draw, but the second contest in Mexico City was a 4-1 rout. Cruz Azul went on to win CONCAChampions.
Leagues Cup, evidently, is a different animal. To say that the Machine broke down is an understatement; to say that it blew up like the Hindenburg is a little closer to the mark.
Nothing about the first half ended up being very notable. The Sounders had a lot of possession early on but missed some chances due to offsides. The most notable thing was a scuffle between Moose and Cruz Azul defender Willer Ditta. The half ended 0-0.
But Seattle wasted no time in the second half. There were two quick corner kicks by the time a couple minutes had passed. The first was deflected back and so came a do-over.
For the first time in what feels like forever, the Sounders scored off a set piece. It was as tailor-made as any corner could be: Albert sent in the service, Yeimar beat Ditta on the aerial and headed it into the net.
That was the 48th minute. The next forty were like nothing I have ever seen at Lumen.
Alex Roldan brought the ball up the near side in the 50th and gave the ball over to Obed. Obed took a shot that hit Ditta’s foot and lofted into the net.
At this point, Cruz Azul was having what could be termed a bad game. Specifically Willer Ditta. It just continued for Ditta in the 54th, as he let a Jackson Ragen ball upfield for Nouhou blow past him and so Nouhou give a layup of a pass for Ferreira, but Nouhou had been slightly offside.
Not that it mattered. Seattle got a corner a few minutes later. Albert sent it in, Cristian headed it from the near side to the far side, and Ferreira tapped it in with an easy line on net. Ditta was manning Yeimar this time, but Jorge Sánchez did the bad defensive job for him, letting Ferreira ease a few steps ahead.
I thought it was done after that. The Sounders fell back in a more defensive posture as Cruz Azul put some attacks together. Not very threatening ones, but into the final third at least. Shades of games where Seattle coasted after going up were a little present.
That phase of the game lasted about ten minutes. The ball came back over into the attacking half. Once again, Ditta got his doors completely blown off his hinges by a scoring Sounder, this time in the 69th minute as he did the world’s worst job of marking Osaze de Rosario. Obed and Ryan Kent connected to get the ball to Osaze up top, and another goal zoomed in.
4-0 is about the point where a game is basically in the books. But on Thursday, 4-0 is what opened the floodgates. Cruz Azul all but gave up. Someone must have invented de-aging technology and used it on the Cementeros, because they played like middle schoolers out there for the last 20 minutes.
It was about this point Pedro de la Vega came into the match. He made a star’s entrance in the 76th during one of the many times this game the Sounders were cutting through Cruz Azul’s final third defense with ease.
5-0 is a wild score all on its own. But oh no, Seattle wasn’t done.
An 88th minute free kick by Danny Leyva bounced off the crossbar and rolled right up into the box for an ecstatic Nouhou, who tapped it in with his head.
Six. Nil. There wasn’t a whole lot of stoppage, but lo and behold, the Sounders used what little time there was to reach perfection.
As the 90th minute ended and the 91st began, Alex sent a majestic ball across the pitch for Pedro, who kicked it in midair and sent a curler off the inside of the right post and in for goal number seven.
The number of completion.
Equal parts beautiful, clinical, and comical. Schmetzer, ever the serious man, downplayed the third part.
“You can watch South Park if you want comic relief,” Schmetzer remarked. “This was just a really good, solid win.”
The understatement of the millennium: calling Thursday a “really good, solid win.” Another similarity with the Mineiraço, I guess; the Germans took no time to revel in their 7-1 semifinal thrashing and kept their eyes on the prize (and, of course, won it). That’s the attitude you want your coach and team to have, after all. Locked in.
Pedro, similarly, was focused on the bigger picture.
“Obviously, it’s very positive, it’s something pretty,” Pedro said. “But I think we are a very cognizant team, and workers in that sense. And we know that we can celebrate today and tomorrow, but then there is not that much time in between for the next game.”*
But as a writer, I am more than happy to partake in a little reveling (and wallowing, on the other side of things). In a game like that, there are phases that you go through when you witness it.
First, there is appreciation of striking the first blow. You say good job. You want them to keep up the pressure.
When they do, it’s awesome. Wow, you say to yourself. They didn’t let up. This is amazing, this team is actually really good.
Then they keep going. You start to feel a little bad for the opponents. Jeez, you think. Five-nothing? Six-nothing? That’s got to hurt.
About seven is where it’s hilarious. There’s no conscious thought, just a knowledge that the sport you are watching has a cosmic sense of humor.
Cruz Azul spent about seven times more than Seattle over the past year. Seattle beat Cruz Azul by seven goals to nothing. If that’s not both beautiful and comical at the same time, I don’t know what is.
*Translated from the following: Obviamente es muy positivo, es algo lindo. Pero creo que somos un equipo muy consciente, y trabajadores en este sentido. Y sabemos que podemos disfrutar hoy y mañana, pero ya no hay tanto tiempo entre para el siguiente partido.
